Sometimes you just have to suck it up.

This is not going to be nearly as long as my last post but I just wanted to get some thoughts out. N and I were talking tonight and it really got me thinking about how we look at life, and how many little things I have let stress me out lately, and how many of those things REALLY don't matter. Life is always going to throw things at you, and it is all about how you respond to them that makes you who you are. You have to think, is this really worth my energy? will getting upset about this help anything? and the answer is normally no. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and be happy! Only you are in control of the happiness in your life, if you want there to be happiness, then let it in! allow it to take over you! I don't understand why it is so strange for someone to just be generally happy anymore. If someone is in a good mood there always has to be a reason. But I think from now on I am going to force myself to only allow joyful things into my life, not saying I'm avoiding the bad but I have control over what affects me. BE HAPPY! =D

Forgiveness, define that for me... What does it mean to Forgive. Sure the Bible says to forgive, and to not only forgive once but to forgive 77 times. But what does forgiveness look like? I've been struggling with this question a lot the last couple days, mainly because I am feeling negative emotions toward someone I thought I had, in my heart, forgiven. Does it mean you can have a normal conversation with that person, without holding a grudge? or bringing up the situation in question? Does it mean you want the best for them? despite what they did? Does it mean you feel content about what they did to you? I'm not sure. I want to say I have forgiven this person and truly wish the best for them, but I want to feel it in my heart. N had a great quote "forgiveness is when you see the person that caused you harm, and instead of wishing evil upon them, you pray for them instead. It's an attitude change." I thought this was a great way of putting it. Another thing I thought of for my own situation is that forgiveness is no longer letting that situation affect how I view myself, or that person. This view relates directly back to the happiness I was talking about earlier, I can control what I think about myself, and what I let get to me. The Devil is incredibly crafty and I just have to rely on Christ to help me fight the bad thoughts and only entertain the good and hopeful. The amount of good that has come out of this situation is ASTOUNDING, I have met and grown closer to the friends I'm certain I will have for the rest of my life. I have regained my relationship with God, I have started to become the woman I want to be. And the man of my dreams seemed to fall right into my life. =D My only regret is that I let myself stray so far from God that this had to happen to get me back. But I am thankful everyday to serve a God who will fight for me, when I don't deserve it. And I am going to challenge myself to pour good into people who we may think don't deserve it. If God can show me this much love, I can make an effort to get out of my comfort zone and help build up others. Don't underestimate the power of happiness.

If anyone actually does read this, I'd love to know your thoughts, like I said I'm trying to figure it out.

Corrie Ten Boom, a Christian woman who survived a Nazi concentration camp during the Holocaust said "Forgiveness is to set a prisoner free, and to realize the prisoner was you."

God is Love
Christ is Truth

A "blogger", that sounds weird...

So here we go!? I created a blog, why? I couldn't really tell you. Probably for the fact that I have so many thoughts racing through my mind on a daily basis that getting them out in some way should be beneficial right? And while I'm pouring my thoughts onto a document it might as well have a pretty background and a url to go with it. Now, I am not expecting anyone to read this, I can't think of many people's lives that I would want to be this up to date on but I guess it is here if anyone should care.

Well I guess this should start with who Mariah Acord is. I am a broken child of God, first and foremost. I am the daughter to two of the most amazing parents one could ever ask for, and I couldn't be doing half of what I'm doing with my life if it wasn't for them. I am also the sister to one of the coolest brothers ever. I am a student at the University of Cincinnati, studying Digital Design. I'm short, around 5'3" unfortunately. I am competitive to an almost unreasonable extent (ask anyone who has ever beat me at anything). I am happy and blessed in ways that I couldn't even imagine. I think thats a good enough start considering I'm not really sure who I am yet and get reminded of that on a daily basis.

To elaborate, I am a broken child of God. It seems hard to remember that this life is a small fraction of eternity and I seem to focus on right now a lot more than I should be. It is a funny thing how God works, or how I have seen God work in my life recently. It seems that He will always bring you back to Him, and you just have to be willing to listen, which I have to tell you is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. But I can't even explain how amazing the benefits are. Its also crazy to look back and see how God prepared you for what was about to happen, in May of last year I met my best friend Nessa, which in turn got me living in the apartment I am now, meeting some of the most amazing people and friends i could ever ask for, and an incredible support system. I have never really been one for showing/ expressing emotions other than happiness to friends. And she likes to point this out to me on a weekly basis =) but when it comes to someone who knows what your thinking, is able to give you incredibly helpful advice and is feeling something very similar to what you are, there is no comparison. Everyone always talked about accountability and I always found that silly, but now, having someone to keep me accountable is beyond helpful to my spiritual growth. You never realize how thankful you are for someone until they show you love when you absolutely 100% don't deserve it. In January I went through one of the worst spiritual battles I have ever had the pleasure of fighting. And I will tell you, if it was not for her I would still be lost and and father away from God than I have ever been. For someone to show you love in your darkest hour, is the sign of an amazing blessing.

Which brings me to the latest blessing in my life. one of my best friends of 5 years is now my boyfriend. And normally I look down upon people who rush into relationships and just talk about how happy they are immediately after. But I'm doing to be that person so if that annoys you like it did me, skip this paragraph. I cannot tell you how ecstatic I am to be dating him. I have never felt so comfortable or sure of anything in my life. And people keep asking me "how did this happen" and to be honest I'm still trying to figure that out. All I know is I could not be more excited. Yes he is in the Navy and stationed many states away, and yes I won't get to see him for months, but for some reason that doesn't seem to matter =)

Well this has already turned out to be longer than I expected it to be and even though I have plenty more to talk about I'm not sure anyone would care to read it and I think this is enough for the first one. I think I'm going to like this blogging thing =)